According to the holy grail of information on the internet, Wikipeida, running shorts are designed for comfort and free movement during exercise.
BULL SHIT!
Running shorts are torture devices that lure fat people ( A.K.A.– ME) with their pretty colors and fun prints into thinking we can run in them. The only thing running shorts are good for is giving one a horrific case of chub rub. Running shorts constantly creep up between my legs.
Ladies and Gents, my thighs rub together. When I run, I create enough friction between my legs to start a camp fire. THIGH on THIGH action is NOT, I repeat NOT, Sexy. Not to mention, it is quite distributing watching an overweight woman pick a crotch creeper discretely as she tires to continue to run.
THANK THE BABY JESUS (or what ever deity you would like to thank) they have built in underwear or my ass cheeks would also be making an appearance as I wiggle and jiggle around the track.
Why do they make they make these shorts in an XL?
Since I know this is just a FAT money maker for athletic gear companies across the country, I think manufactures should be courteous and include a tube of Body Glide with every XL purchase. This way us fatties don’t need to ask for “anti–chafing cream” (avoiding the words Body Glide) from a pubescent stock boy at the Sports Authority.
**I am starting a new series every Friday. I will talk specifically about all things fitness. Including rants about chub rub, which I know you are hoping I keep to a minimum.
This is a hilarious post!!!!
I’ve been a lurker on your blog for over a year. Not much to comment but I couldn’t help myself on this one. I can’t tell you how many “cute” shorts I’ve bought hoping that this would be the pair that I didn’t have to constantly pick out but alas another failure. Great post..thanks for the laugh as well as the appreciation that I’m not the only one.
Thanks Krista.
Beth you are not alone!
Funny post! No matter how cute the shorts I know I’ll be unhappy two minutes into a workout if I wear them. I love long shorts – just above the knee – flattering, and super comfortable for workouts.
*snort*
How are we expected to work if it is so uncomfortable!?
How can we get skinnier (and avoid the chub rub) if we don’t work out?
It is a vicious, vicious circle….
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Selecting the perfect pair of athletic shorts depends a lot on your height, your assets and any problem areas you wish to downplay.but these shorts are just so great .